Always an angel
Okay it’s been one week. I haven’t done anything tragic or humiliating or terrible. I haven’t messaged him. I’ve only driven by his house 14 times.
I’m kidding!
11 times.
No no no. I’m being silly. It’s been 8 times. I have only driven by his house 8 times and only twice have I camped out overnight.
I’m growing, being such an adult.
It helps that I’ve been keeping busy and occupied with work and gym and other boys and obsessing over my looming uterus removal.
Maybe I’ll go get some Botox and dermal fillers.
So I already knew this about me, but the past week has really driven it home. I need the approval and admiration and validation of men to feel good about myself. one boy doesn’t like me? I need three others to tell me how cute/funny/sexy/smart I am. It is pathetic and I am disgusted with myself. But I am who I am.
I skipped the national for this jerk. THE NATIONAL. I can’t even look at myself.
Maybe it’s not that I’m “too much” ERIKA maybe it’s that you aren’t ENOUGH. Maybe it is you who is lacking. Ever think about that? Huh? DIDJA?
What’s that Sia song? Only a genius could love a woman like me.
Ooh ooh! I’ve thought of a name for the new season. Hot heaux summer is gone. Now it’s time for me to fall into grace.
Pretty good eh.