Haikus
who doesn’t love a good haiku?
Reader submissions accepted! email me your haikus and I’ll post them. unless they are dumb or I don’t like them. but I might post them to make fun of them. so go ahead and send me what you got and let’s just see what happens.
The rules of haiku can get kind of complicated, see for yourself, but let’s just stick with the basics. I’ll accept haiku that follow the 5-7-5 structure we are all familiar with, but if you wanna go out on a limb, give me the english form of 11 syllables, 3-5-3. also i guess you aren’t supposed to use the word “haikus” but whatever.
let the haikuing begin…
soda tastes so good
if the stupid cafe stays
open long enough
by cjm
poems with dumb rules
are better than anything
I just took a crap
by morgan
here we are again
voting for a new leader
for the next four years
by brasten
more peeps need to write
some freaking haikus for loafe
so I feel better
by loafe
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
shit shit shit shit fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck shit fuck
translation:
(today is a shit-
ty day for me and my dumb-
ass poetry, dood)
by becca, whose subject line was de-lite-full: “haikuzen (excuse me!)”
Live Love Loafe is Grand
Christa, Morgan and the rest
Writings in the Sand
by DG
Monkey with a tie
Kong, bane of my existence
Another barrel!
by fineous j. humpington
toddlers everywhere
into every bloody thing
is it naptime yet?
by michelle (from PA)
this haiku is just
a sentence that rambles on
with no real point
by morgan
don’t look in mirrors
the reflection back – unkind.
pretend i don’t care.
by Fi
need, crave, yearning for
warm tingles, orgasmic bliss
make me come alive.
by Fi
My sexy bootie
Will sex you up all night long
And into the morn
by christian
the pain of defeat
a life spent mostly training
I end up with zilch
by brasten
on big brother contestant circa 2000
Brittany, hair so pink
A nose ring and pretty feet
From Minnesota
by christian
Yummy meat from pig
Fills my senses, sex no match
Bacon, I am yours
by christian
Bah, girl annoys
Ignored me, didn’t tell me
Dated an ass clown
by christian
Yummy white center
Twist and lick, Oreo, yum
Turns my poopoo black
by christian
Behind, hands on hips
Lips kissing behind the ear
Soft sighs leave her lips
by christian
Found in the mix of christian’s haikus from above was a dirty haiku that I wrote, from 2002. oh, the lovely days before the baby…
yes it is so true
my aching tongue desires
to delight the clit
by christa
this summer so sweet
children laughing at the beach
when, why must it end
by DG
China Buffet Shrimp
feeds me like a great big pimp
must work out today
by DG
haiku written immediately after sleeping with my husband
the best orgasms
are the ones that make the balls
of your feet flutter
by becca
YAY OLYPMIC HAIKU!
michael phelps won gold
will he win another medal?
tune in tomorrow
by michelle from PA
no more drinks for me
for six years no barracho
sobriety rocks on
by DG
goin’ for the gold
your favorite athlete
is someone I do not know
and/or care about
by morgan
let’s all cheer for them
they’re the very best athletes
no one knows their names
by morgan
I love commercials
so I watch the Olympics
Thank you NBC!
by morgan
My life long dream is
for Olympic athletes to
slap me on the ass
by morgan
loafe worship
Christa is Goddess
we bow low at her altar
LOAFE is forever
by DG
Short attention span theatre
Watch the olympics
See the pretty athletes go
Then change the channel
by DG
I hate Nancy Next Door
neighbor Nancy sucks
called the police on me
think she poisons cats
by DG
expressing oneself
in seventeen syllables
is very diffic
from tonya who heard it on howard stern
your cock is like some
new candy i never had
before. i like it.
by becca
A good haiku is
A tiny fiber pellet
cleansing the clogged mind
by John
Foreign policy
Shooting wolves from an airplane
Palin is the suck
by tiffany