A win is a win

I was very despondent Tuesday and Wednesday. Even with a win, I felt like we failed.

I wanted a resounding victory. Control of the senate. A complete and total shaming of the Republican party. I wanted a landslide. A blue tsunami. The American people saying “we have had enough.” Show the world that we fucked up four years ago but were gonna fix it now.

That didn’t happen. In fact, the opposite kind of happened. We were creamed down-ballot. And even as it became clearer and clearer that we were gonna win the big one, it still hurt. Really hurt.

Today was much better. I’ve calmed down considerably. Clearly we are going to win this. And he’s going to take the popular vote by at least five million. So the majority of American people DID say enough is enough. Republicans who can’t stand him voted our way (and then of course went down the ballot to stay loyal to their shitty party).

I am not going to move. This is my country. They don’t get to push me out. That’s what they want! For us to give up. No. Let racism and white nationalists win? No. We stay and we fight and we work to change. We did the right thing and voted this motherfucker out and now it’s time to put in the work.

one thing is certain. I do not and will not make space for Trump voters. Democrats (white democrats) now lecturing us that we have to pay attention to these assholes? That we need to give credence to their voices, all these “working class” voters who continue coming out in droves for trump?

Fuck that.

we owe this win to BIPOC. And in particular black and latino women. It is a slap in the face to now ask us to welcome these racists, have them sit next to us, to try and understand their anger and learn what they want. A slap in the face and a kick in the tits and a punch in the ovaries.

But I suppose I am being unreasonable here. After all, they just want the simple things… jobs, and health care, and money; a decent life for them and their kids. and all without having to give those same opportunities to BIPOC. That isn’t too much to ask. So why are we being such cunts about it? God.



HOPE IS FOR FOOLS

Granted I am suffering from intense 2016 PTSD, but I am again broken. This country. What a shame. I needed a decisive victory. I needed it. Of course the win matters, no matter the score, and the game isn’t over. but I just really needed to know that this country could right the ship in a resounding manner. And they didn’t. They didn’t and it makes me sick.

Where do I go? I can’t continue to live in such a complete and total shithole of a country. I mean honestly. what in the fuck is the matter with people. But what choice do I have? Where can we go? we have nowhere to go.

Sigh.

What a bag of dicks, this life.


even darkness must pass

On this day I am reminded of one of the best scenes from lord of the rings (the two towers). Sam (who we all know is 1000x braver and more heroic than whiny old Frodo) reminds us exactly what we are doing:

https://youtu.be/k6C8SX0mWP0

It’s been four long exhausting years, and that was 2020 alone. I am tired. Bedraggled. Worn down and worn out.

it’s been rough.

Look at us in 2016, so happy, so hopeful, so excited! compared to me voting now.

Voting then and now

But like sam, I believe there’s still some good left in this world. and my country will do the right thing today. And then we can begin the long road back to decency.

It starts today.

And if we lose? If the good guys lose? Then I’m either taking my kids and sneaking under the cloak of night into Canada, begging them for asylum, or I am driving us all off fucking cliff.