tonight we make babies

This evening is our annual office christmas party, which should be quite fun. I love swanky parties in upscale locales where I totally don’t fit in and have nothing but hatred and hostility for the other people involved.

But the food and the booze are all free. And I’m a girl who likes to eat and drink my misery and uncomfortableness away. Besides, if you can’t get lit with your co-workers, then you are living no kind of life.

I haven’t been to an AEI christmas party since 2003.

For those of you not doing the math…that is the night that I got pregnant! yipee!

I won’t really be making babies tonight though. First of all, because I’m not ovulating. Second, I’m sick. I don’t have sex when I’m sick. Unless it was with someone I really really really wanted to have sex with. But he’s not here, so no baby-making, sick or otherwise, for the cjm.

Speaking of babies, ever notice the evil looks people give you when you leave your child, carseat and all, on the side of the road, because you’ve been stuck in traffic for 45 minutes and your head is pounding, because he was screaming like a banshee, because you won’t unbuckle him and let him climb around like a monkey inside your car, because you think if I have to endure this one more minute I will surely lose my mind??

No, they think you’re just being a bad mother, not seeing how they narrowly escaped becoming part of the nightly news, when a crazed woman took down an entire freeway of cars with her bare hands.

• ← my wicked jealous heart
• camcorder or camera? →