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And let’s love loud
Let’s love now
Cause soon enough we’ll die

Cause soon enough we’ll die

In this time of decay and rot, it’s so unfair how hard they’ve made it to get the really good pharmaceuticals. We have to somehow survive this world, sober and aware?! Whhhhyyyy? It should be easier to get them, not harder. EASIER! now more than ever. wth.

Hold on lemme pop a Vicodin real quick…

okay!

So after watching the absurdity of this bullshit show on tv called “the shitting upon of every American ideal” all I can say is:

-Hope you enjoyed your democracy america! It’s all over now. You understand what they’re doing right? When this president is acquitted, it will cement their fucked up insane defense that he’s doing what he’s doing in the public’s interest and so it’s all okay. They’re telling us he can and will cheat to win, at all costs, and it is totally okay, no one can stop it, and besides that it is a good thing, it’s what is best for us after all. That is what happens in a monarchy. In a dictatorship. Hello Supreme Leader. Yippee!

-If you think for half a second that shitbags Collins and Murkowski and their shitbag questions about Biden suggests at all in any way that they will do the right thing… HahHAhahaHahaaah. Hilarious. It’s all a show. They will fall into line because that’s what they do. All their “furious scribbling” aside. I’m pretty sure they were writing “lol the democrats will believe anything.”

-I want Elizabeth Warren to win so bad, maybe even more than Hillary. I don’t say this lightly! My entire heart and soul was invested into HRC and my coping mechanisms when she lost absolutely destroyed whatever good was left inside me. I won’t be happy voting for anyone else. god, WHAT IF I HAVE TO VOTE FOR BIDEN?! Ugh. Just kill me. Thankfully buttigieg won’t win, voting for him is one nightmare I won’t have to endure. yay?

-if I never have to tolerate another man for the rest of my life, that’ll be too soon.

-Fuck this, I’m taking another Vicodin.

I think it all ended for me on dec 12 2012. We all know life is shit and what ever joy we can suck out of it is short and fleeting and pointless. But it really sunk in the day a boy murdered 20 children in an elementary school and it didn’t change a single fucking thing. Nothing changed. Nothing.

We all just shrugged and said “well. I guess that’s just how it is.”

We all went on living with it.

I have never recovered from this incident. Never. I cannot imagine the parents of those sweet sweet kids. I have donated what stupid little money I have to them. But it doesn’t matter.

The anniversary of my mother’s death is coming soon and I miss her and I am angry and I am sad and I watch the world and I see my boys and I just cannot even breathe. I try so hard to teach them kindness and love and patience, to be better to be different to not be what the world tells them to be, and I just fail. Every day I fail and so I rage and I wish this entire horrible rotten human experiment would just end already.

I give up on you, universe. I give up. You vote that man into office? But turn away from 20 six year olds shot dead?

I don’t want no music tonight.

For all that is good and beautiful in this world please please Kamala Harris… do not endorse Biden. I beg you.

I’m on my knees.

Please.