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10 Things Easing My Winter Blues

1. My absolutely gorgeous iPod that my boyfriend George, George Glass bought me for christmas. He even got it engraved! On the sleek, shiny silver back it says:
live, love, loafe…
tripping lights fantastic
Isn&#146t that splendid? You may be asking should such a frivolous, materialistic object make me so happy. And I say ABSOLUTELY!

2. Adult Swim on cartoon network. In particular, Futurama and Family Guy repeats Mon-Thurs, and the Sunday night line up, which includes Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Sealab 2021, Space Ghost and The Brak Show. I really have to thank Jeff for introducing me to the glorious insane world of ATHF.

3. Arrested Development on Fox and Scrubs on NBC. These two shows are such gleeful fun and so satisfying. They prove two things about sitcoms. One, the absence of a laugh track is a beautiful thing; two, TV is the greatest thing to ever happen, ever.

4. Curb Your Enthusiasm, season 1, on DVD next week. If I had HBO I would surely have included on this list the brand new season that just began. But alas, I am HBO-free. I really should just subscribe to it already.

5. My new soft fluffy organic cotton robe that, when I wear it, transforms me into a healthy happy cloud floating lazy in the sky.

6. Three straight shut-outs by Coyotes goalie Brian Boucher. God I love that team. And those new jerseys are just plain sexy. You Phoenix residents are damn lucky.

7. So Alive by Ryan Adams. There are no words to express how I feel about this song; just listen to it and be inspired and moved.

8. The Goddess pendant my friend Marianne sent to me. Already I feel my world changing and moving into better alignment.

9. Entertainment Weekly. It is practically my bible.

10. The Jet Propulsion Laboratory, those crazy scientists and that plucky sublime grand old Spirit; it all just makes me so giddy.

Listening/using/watching/thinking about these ten things keep me from being one beastly grumpasaurus rex. At all other times, you would do well to stay away. It is January after all, prime grumpasaurus time.

They always get me down.

It is true. After two glorious weeks of freedom, I am back at work today.

I have two words for returning: lame, annoying and depressing. I have vowed that someday, even if it kills me, I will have a job that I enjoy. A job that challenges me and inspires me and doesn&#146t incite fits of rage. My job is far from horrible. But it certainly is not interesting or exciting or remotely stimulating.

Don&#146t get me wrong. I am VERY glad to have a job that does not involve bugs, name tags, bodily fluids in any capacity, children, time clocks, mops or, good god, MANUAL LABOR.

As an American citizen though it is my duty to be ungrateful and demand more.

Hey, you know something I got for Christmas that I am loving very much? The Tick DVD. There are only 9 episodes and it makes me very sad. Only 9 episodes! It is a real travesty. My only solace that this goofy and irreverent show is no longer on the air is the premiere of Celebrity Mole Yucatan on Wednesday night and The Simple Life DVD debut in a few weeks. Thank god for small miracles.

There is no class anymore. I mean truly, just no class. I am not classy. Christa and class are not familiar friends. I am crude and rude, full of slacker carelessness. But I know what class is, what it means, and where it is woefully absent. I look around and I see nothing with class. Not any more. And honestly, it floors me.

I am the first in line to be classless! But when I see Tom Brokaw on Conan, making jokes about Paris Hilton&#146s sex video (or is it plural now?), I want to curl into a ball and writhe and wait for release, pure sweet release, please please, just give it to me, I am only human.

Can you imagine Walter Cronkite cracking one-liners about the dirty sex lives of his contemporaries? Christ in a bucket, James Earl Jones, the supposed paradigm of good taste, is selling PHONE TIME and &#147dancing&#148 about it on national television. The only way to make John Wayne a shill? Wait till he dies, resurrect him in celluloid, and then begin administering the rape and degradation of his image. How fabulous! How perfectly delightful! The American Way! What dead celebrity can we next envision hawking televisions and cars and shoes and makeup and toys?

What does this say to you? No. Really. Let&#146s think about it. What is this telling you?

It tells me there is no grace left in this world. Can it be true?

I&#146m only looking for a little. It&#146s all I need. All we need. Is there no one left to inspire us?

Here&#146s a novel idea. Let&#146s honor integrity. Let us start immediately, today, right now. When I see Tom Brokaw peddling the wares of the classless, greedy media we&#146ve crowned King of America…well, we&#146ve got precious little integrity remaining. Once it&#146s gone, we&#146ve nothing left. Nothing at all.

I was away in DC for the holiday. I hope everyone had a lovely winter solstice! I know I did. I quite enjoy having nothing to do all day but eat candy and watch movies.

Now I am back in Boston, with a nice little pile of goodies from friends, families, lovers and countrymen.

I had a lot of interesting thoughts on the drive both to and from Washington. Long drives are always good for interesting thoughts. But I can&#146t remember them all properly right now, so they&#146ll have to wait, but there were good ones to be sure!

I was planning on NYC for new year celebrations, but I have changed my mind and will spend it in my pajamas in a darkened corner of my bedroom, quite likely in a curled, rocking position. No I kid, but I have cancelled my NYC plans. These days, fun costs too much money.