Sleep Patrol.
It’s time I had a little talk with my sleep patrolmen and the officials in charge of sleep quality. I am very disappointed in their performance. All of them are slacking on the job, letting in all sorts of riff raff, causing a ruckus, creating disturbances, failing to cleanup crime scenes, leaving everything a mess. It is making my sleep time uncomfortable and troublesome and I am not happy about it. They need to shape up or ship out! That’s right! SHAPE UP OR SHIP OUT.
I will tell them as much at our next board meeting. Those boys need to be fighting off all those distractions and noises and keeping the pathways of slumber clean and safe so I may walk down them freely to a restful night.