When is it safe to let go and when should you stay and fight? The eternal battle. Holding on. I do it too much.<\/p>\n
I’m very good at it. I’m an expert. I’m not a packrat, I’m a memory keeper. I have boxes of nostalgia, everywhere in my life. everywhere in my head.<\/p>\n
I stand between two peaks, both calling to me, whispering their secrets.<\/p>\n
One is history. Somewhere to belong. Connection. Home is here.<\/p>\n
The other–living in the moment, unencumbered, unburdened. Home is everywhere.<\/p>\n
What’s worth keeping and what’s worth throwing away?<\/p>\n
Burn everything. Once it’s gone, you can’t get it back. I need this lesson. I need this understanding to dawn. I am too tangled. dusty cobwebs. Burn the letters, the pictures, the stories, the past. Burn it or bury yourself. It’s a choice.<\/p>\n
The struggle though. What is going too far and what is not far enough?<\/p>\n
Everything. Nothing. Either. Or. The in between is killing me.<\/p>\n
Burn the bad. Burn the good. What’s the difference?<\/p>\n
Him = good.<\/p>\n
Them = bad.<\/p>\n
my childhood = good.<\/p>\n
my childhood = bad.<\/p>\n
love here.
\nlove gone.<\/p>\n
holding on
\nletting go<\/p>\n
history.
\nnow.<\/p>\n
see? you can’t distinguish.<\/p>\n
It’s all fleeting. A flash. A wink. A breeze. <\/p>\n
I just want to feel secure. It’s all I know. It’s me. It’s made me me. Even the bad–it’s me. the sun needs his moon. the moon needs her ocean. the ocean needs its sky.<\/p>\n
If I burn it now, I can’t find it again someday, when I’m 300 years old. I won’t be able to find it and smile and remember. oh that memory. The greatest sadness ever there was.<\/p>\n
torn between two lovers feeling like a fool.<\/p>\n
There is no Now without History.<\/p>\n
Forget. Remember.<\/p>\n
It’s a choice.<\/p>\n
I’ve been making the wrong one?<\/p>\n
Save Ry’s history.<\/p>\n
Burn mine?<\/p>\n
I’ll stand in this valley and never make a choice, because I’ll never get it right.<\/p>\n
time to make dinner, eh? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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