{"id":3476,"date":"2023-11-09T02:50:04","date_gmt":"2023-11-09T09:50:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/?p=3476"},"modified":"2023-11-09T02:50:05","modified_gmt":"2023-11-09T09:50:05","slug":"i-cant-find-surrender-and-i-cant-keep-control","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/?p=3476","title":{"rendered":"I can’t find surrender and I can’t keep control"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Sometimes I understand things. Sometimes they make sense. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

What I am not understanding and what I cannot make sense of is this boy in my life. He is maddening. and magnetic. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You could tell me he is crazy in love with me and I would believe it. You could also tell me he can’t stand me and I would believe that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In reality, it is neither of those things. He doesn’t love me. he doesn’t hate me. he doesn’t want me. but he doesn’t want to let me go. So I remain fixed under his gaze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are others. Boys who genuinely like me and my company. And I like them. I want them all. Boys boys all type of boys. Old boys, new boys, all the boys. Sometimes I feel like I’m Tina (from bob’s burgers), just absolutely shit brained boy crazy bonkers. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why do they have to be so cute all the time!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I hate them. Every single one. You’re all the worst. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

5 more weeks. Till sex. 3 more weeks till gym. I’m feeling pretty great. No pain. I want to go back to gym. I won’t. Will follow doctor’s orders. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But fear not, little bunnies. my sex drive has not diminished. This makes me pleased. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The real test will be in another several weeks. Will report back. My internet bot readers are so so curious. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sometimes I understand things. Sometimes they make sense. Sometimes. What I am not understanding and what I cannot make sense of is this boy in my life. He is maddening.… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3476","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3476","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3476"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3476\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3477,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3476\/revisions\/3477"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3476"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3476"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3476"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}