it’s that time of year folks, when white people eat mexican food, drink margaritas, give happy wishes to their mexican janitors, cleaning women, gardeners\/landscapers and various hired help, and in general just feel very festive and cultured.<\/p>\n
That’s right. Cinco de Mayo!<\/p>\n
Let all Americans celebrate the Mexican victory over those fruity freaking French at Puebla. Have a tortilla. Eat some salsa. Drink a Corona with a lime in it! For one day, don’t snarl obscenities at their inability to speak English.<\/p>\n
All kidding aside, I love Cinco de Mayo.<\/p>\n
What makes me laugh is watching these morning programs and these rich, unbelievably WHITE anchors (even the non-whites on those shows are white) feature Mexican food and music. Any other day of the year and Mexicans are a source of great ire. But not today, because today is fun! It’s happy! It’s easy and exciting to say! cinco de mayo! A holiday we can all use as an excuse to get drunk and fat. It’s hilarious, it really is.<\/p>\n
Let’s close with the immortal words of Liz Phair: “Cinco de mayo, burn-out Ohio. It wasn’t me this time letting you go.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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