In bed. Windows open. Listening to a cold, early-summer rain. It\u2019s soft. Steady. There aren\u2019t enough of these nights. Not here anyway. Never enough rain. Never enough water. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
(water makes me feel better. I always forget that, until I remember.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
the rain is nice. But I am tired. In the metaphorical “we are all tired, so tired” way. But also TIRED. Like, actual sleepytime eyes wide open tired.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
put your hand on my skin, feel how tired I am. the nerves underneath your fingers vibrating with wired exhaustion. The tiredness leaking out my pores and staining the air. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI can\u2019t sleep.\u201d The insomniac\u2019s life story. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
But see, I can sleep. I sleep two or three or five hours. Sometimes I even sleep for seven or eight. But it’s so disjointed. No normal cycling through the stages. It’s all zig-zaggy. never really asleep, never really awake. I get enough sleep to be alive. But I’m just an echo, an echo of someone real. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I want sleep. But more than sleep, I want rest. So if an insomniac is someone who can’t sleep, what is someone who can’t rest? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
a ghost. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
a living breathing ghost that you can see. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In bed. Windows open. Listening to a cold, early-summer rain. It\u2019s soft. Steady. There aren\u2019t enough of these nights. Not here anyway. Never enough rain. Never enough water. (water makes… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2003","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2003","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2003"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2003\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2007,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2003\/revisions\/2007"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2003"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2003"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2003"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}