{"id":161,"date":"2005-01-20T17:05:53","date_gmt":"2005-01-21T01:05:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.loafe.com\/wp\/?p=161"},"modified":"2005-01-20T17:05:53","modified_gmt":"2005-01-21T01:05:53","slug":"aye-carumba","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/?p=161","title":{"rendered":"aye carumba"},"content":{"rendered":"

I&#146ve been given a lot of projects to start with my new work at home job. Except for it isn&#146t really a job, just this thing where I do some projects for some guy who publishes a magazine. The magazine itself isn&#146t my cup of tea, but the actual magazine stuff IS so it&#146s kind of cool. I won&#146t be making tons of money, but every little bit helps. Plus it&#146s nice to have something other than baby poop to focus on. Not that I focus on baby poop a lot, but you get my meaning.<\/p>\n

I gave Gordon a BJ for the first time in a long time the other night. We&#146re talking a really really long time here kids. Since right before Ryland was born. wowza. It wasn&#146t nearly as bad as I thought it would be and I didn&#146t puke or even really gag that much. BJs are funny in that you sort of forget how to do it when you&#146ve been on vacation for a bit. I guess after a few minutes my old flair and style came back to me, but I still sort of forgot. <\/p>\n

I gotta tell you though, I don&#146t much care right now if I ever see another penis again. I&#146m too tired and bitchy and down on myself to want sex. I&#146m half-way serious when I tell Gordon to pick up a mistress, so he doesn&#146t have to keep bothering me. I&#146ve read the books and the magazines that talk about getting your love life back after a kid and the things they suggest make me vomit. All romantic stupid cheesy things. I have zero interest in that noise. Calling it a love life right now just made me vomit.<\/p>\n

I suppose I should be more affectionate and intimate with G, because despite his complete lack of maturity, honesty, trustworthiness and dependability, I AM fond of the guy. But everything I have in that department goes to Ryland. I&#146m all cuddled out.<\/p>\n

Speaking of Ryland, his farts are so smelly today. What on this good earth did I eat to make him stink so bad? jesus in a tin can.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I&#146ve been given a lot of projects to start with my new work at home job. Except for it isn&#146t really a job, just this thing where I do some… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-161","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=161"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=161"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=161"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=161"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}