I did it. I finally succumbed. I am now in the clutches of big government. I let them inject me with their population control and tracking device…<\/p>\n
I got a flu shot. <\/p>\n
I surely shall live to regret this but you know I just can’t fight them anymore. They’re too strong and I’m too weak and now I’ll be just another grain of sand in their beach of lies and deceit and betrayal. <\/p>\n
It is so hot in my bedroom right now. It says 77 degrees but when you’re as big as I am it’s more like 326 degrees. I can’t sleep. I am so tired though, hot bedroom, so tired. please let me sleep please please, have mercy on my soul on my hot sticky uncomfortable aching soul. <\/p>\n
I just finished my book. I always hate when I finish a good book. cause then it’s over. You’re done. Just like that. It hardly seems fair. No more page turning no more discoveries no more characters, and you’re left in your hot room alone with your empty life and your genital warts and your hat from the renaissance festival of 2006. That was a good year for renaissance. <\/p>\n
Alright. I’m going to put some frozen peas down my pants and tape some frozen fish fillets under my breasts now. 7am comes so much faster when it’s already 1am. <\/p>\n
Wish me luck. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I did it. I finally succumbed. I am now in the clutches of big government. I let them inject me with their population control and tracking device… I got a… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1562","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1562","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1562"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1562\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1562"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1562"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.loafe.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1562"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}