suggestion: do not wipe with cotton candy
so this weekend I used a public restroom in which the toilet paper was like cotton candy. I don’t mean it was soft like cotton candy, I mean it had the texture, the substance, the integrity of cotton candy.
It was flimsy and barely there and melted as soon as it got wet.
I should have tasted it. maybe it WAS cotton candy.
mmmmm. I love cotton candy. if my hair were made of cotton candy, I would be so beautiful. and it would be very delicious to eat me. and my hair. no one would complain ‘your hair is stuck in my mouth.’
that’s not so much a fact as a suggestion.
YOU are THE GREATEST CJM!!!!
I wish you could feel as astonished as I felt reading that your toilet paper had the texture, the substance, the integrity of cotton candy and that you wished your hair were made of cotton candy rather than use the cotton candy to try & make a better life for you & your son.
Ha ha ha. I SUPER heart you, Simon. *le sigh*
oh simon you are the bestest.
I will change my subject just for you becca. although really it SHOULD be fact.