thin is the new skinny
I bought a small travel sized jar of creme de la mer. I thought I’d try it out first, see if the outrageous sum of money they want for a full-size jar is worth the cost. It needs to be crazy good for me to justify the cost. I’m talking white light and butterflies radiating out of my skin good, not just “yeah I guess my skin feels softer and stuff.”
Okay so here’s the situation. We’ve decided to let g’s mother live with us. now some of you may be saying “semantics cjm, semantics” and I say damn right semantics! On the books it may be “her” house, but it sounds a heck of a lot better to say she’s living with us. not as horrifyingly embarrassing. she wants us on that wall, she needs us on that wall, especially given her advancing age and decreasing level of usefulness. When she shuffles off this mortal coil the house will go to G anyway. so yeah, she’s living with us. it’s gonna be okay. she’s living with us. she’s living with us. she’s living with us. it’s gonna be okay.
that’s my story/mantra and I’m sticking to it.
the good news is that the money for our apartment can instead be used to buy a macbook air and $500 headphones. Okay, I already promised my BFF that I wouldn’t buy the headphones, but that laptop will be mine. I may never be svelte but my computer will be puking it up with the best of them in the bathroom of {insert hot LA/NY/Miami/Madison/Omaha/London/Ibiza/Tokoyo club here}. I know I know. save your money, pay bills, be responsible, yes yes. You’re totally right. But here’s my take, in two: 1) I am helping the slumping US economy by spending my money on goods and services. 2) the bills will need to be paid no matter what, so I might as well use the extra money for fun. As for the saving bit…well, you’ve got me there. Me and Saving are kind of fierce enemies. I can’t cave, I’ve fought so hard for so long to just give up and let him win now.
Here’s a picture of what’s on the tshirt for the winner of the CD mix contest I was having. you guys remember that? No? Well, I had a mix CD contest and now several hundred years later, I am finally putting together the prize. What you think? Wish you had participated now, huh? Plus, there are a few other totally awesome things in the prize package. You sorry motherscratchers. You should have sent a CD. You really should have.
A plethora of birthdays are on the horizon. Tomorrow is NT, Thursday is G-dawg girl and G-dawg boy, the 5th brings BFF and ter-bear. hmm. I suppose 5 doesn’t quite a plethora make. Still, that’s a lot of bdays for me to be celebrating. I say this now to you all: hb to you. good job on being born. thank your mom. stop being such punk ass biths. say goodbye to your youth. start planning mid-life crises now. etc.
One more thing: I already have a thursday divinity all lined up. Lost is back! glory to god in the highest. did you know they moved Lost from Wednesday nights to Thursday, as Wed is for bitching and Thursdays are for divineness? Anyway, I am very excited, I like Lost very much.
I’m totally confused. She’s G’s mother-in-law? The reprobate is married, and that poor woman’s mother is going to live with you two? Aren’t you worried word will get back to G’s wife that he’s shacked up with you & that you two have a kid?? I mean, I know what you’re saying, the mother-in-law is old & feeble, but as long as she knows how to use the phone, she poses a risk of calling her daughter and revealing the whereabouts of your love nest. Are you sure this is a good idea?
you think you’re pretty stinkin’ funny don’t you JR.
I fixed the stupid mistake, so now you just look silly and dumb. what is jonathan even talking about?
ha!
You’re right, I AM funny! And handsome. Call me ladies!!