they lost

the bastards. my first B’s game in forever and a year, and they had to lose. in the shoot-out no less.

god damn it.

I don’t even want to talk about it anymore.

also: fuck gordon. fuck him and his fucking 25-year-old prickness. If I could just knock him over the head with a baseball bat, I’d be happy.

and fuck the disgusting girls who sat in front of me and asked me to STOP CHEERING during the game, because apparently my enthusiasm for the hockey game was disrupting their gorging. Like it was fun for me to watch them as they shoveled their fat faces with every kind of disgusting greasy nasty food the garden offered. no joke, in the course of 2 hours I saw them each eat two giant pieces of pizza loaded with 300 kinds of meat, hot dogs, french fries, chicken fingers, pretzels AND soda. bet it was diet soda, too. god they pissed me off.

also, fuck the train.

and fuck the assholes who throw their trash anywhere they please.

you know, just fuck everyone. yeah. fuck everyone.

except for you. yes, you, over there. you, I like. you I want to actually fuck. in the sexual connotation of the word. whereas the previous “fucks” were used in the “I hate you and I wish you were dead” kind of way.

8 thoughts on “they lost

  1. pa michelle

    Stop cheering during a game? Hard to believe. All we have around here is the Baby Pens (the penguins farm team) and people get mad at you if you DON’T cheer. Anyway…what bitches.

  2. Jonathan

    Even though I don’t watch or even understand the appeal of Hockey, I totally know how you feel, thanks to the fucking Patriots and their fucking ridiculous winning ways. Fuck the patriots, in the I hate you & I wish you were dead kind of way. Except for Tom Brady. Fuck him in the sexual connotation of the word. What can I say, he’s a handsome man.

  3. christa

    michelle: bitches is right. I should have been meaner to them. I kept on cheering though and banging the chairs in front of me, right next to them.

    Jonathan: I was very pleased with the Pats win, if only because I knew how annoyed you would be…it’s cute.

    marianne: yes, yes he did tell me that! also, he’s a shithead asshole. last time he’s getting a blow job from me! hope he enjoyed it, cause these lips aren’t going anywhere near his cash and prizes. for a very. long. time.

    mark: I actually like the Senators, just not when they play the Bruins. and I fully believe that Joe Thornton would have continued to not achieve his potential here in Boston. For whatever reason, being on the Bruins kept him from the kind of success he’s getting in San Jose. I’m over Joe. Really. We’re not bitter here at all. Not at all.

    I’m not over Boyes, though.

  4. Jonathan

    Gordon told you that the Bruins loss was no big deal DURING A BLOWJOB? I think you might have bigger issues than just his insensitivity; you might want to look at the quality of blowjob you’re dispensing that has your man discussing Hockey during the act. I don’t mean to brag, but the only thing I’m thinking during my wife’s frequent & voracious assault on my genitals is how to keep from blowing the back of her skull off with the ferocity of my orgasm.

    Of course, on the other hand, it could be that you give an EXCELLENT blowjob, and that Gordon is literally compelled to discuss Hockey in the same way that men traditionally think of baseball during sex to forestall premature orgasm. If this is the case, tell Gordon he doesn’t need to put off coming. I’ve never heard a woman complain that her husband comes too quickly during oral sex.

  5. christa

    jonathan! I am hurt that you think it’s even remotely POSSIBLE I could give bad head. I’m renowned in these here parts when it comes to BJs. I thank a combination of porn & erotica, and lots and lots of time in the field.

    The BJ in question was given earlier in the day, in a most generous fashion, without him even asking. Per our BJ Contract of ’07, this means that he was required to be nice to me for the remainder of the day. He was NOT nice to me for the rest of the day, he was in fact a big fat asshole, the opposite of nice, and therefore, according to the BJ bylaws, he must be punished.

    This punishment can come in a variety of forms, but it will include him not receiving any blow jobs or sex from me until I feel he’s suffered enough. I will also make sure to be the biggest cock tease I possibly can. My greatest power over him is sex. I will use it to my advantage.

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