I have to go back to work on Dec 7th. I am very depressed about this. I suppose it will be a good thing, but I’m hard pressed right now to see how. You get into a groove, a routine, start to figure things out, and then the world says “no I don’t think so, it’s time to change it all. you suck.”
people all over are being laid off but not me. apparently, I’m not special enough to be laid off. I’m sitting here wishing my company would let me go, but nooooo. I have to be awesome. my work has to love me. I get to be told “oh if anything christa this maternity leave of yours has showed us how much we need you.” OF COURSE YOU DO. I’m working for acorns and stickers.
So now I have to go back to work and G gets to stay home and be Mr Mom and my little sweet baby will miss me because I’m his warm soft delicious mom with the warm, sweet delicious milk. He is going to wonder with his squishy little brain where I am, where did his mom go, how could she just abandon him like that. it makes me very sad.
I don’t have a breastpump yet, I have no idea how Nicholas will take to the bottle, I have a ton of work still to do this week, and I just hate the whole world. I don’t want to go anywhere or do anything. I just want to stay inside the house with my baby and watch the snow falling outside and sit in the dark at 2am feeding him, lost in the glow of the christmas tree and the endless quiet. just him and me and no one else.
The Ottawa Senators couldn’t beat the Bruins if the team was replaced with everyone’s grandmas.
the subjects for my posts through christmas are going to be the cheeseball holiday movies found on lifetime and hallmark channel, etc. today is a dog named christmas. a dog named christmas. yep. a dog. named christmas.
I’ve been spending too much time on my iphone. I keep hitting spacebar twice to put in a period. why can’t they make that a thing? Spacebar twice in every typing medium should always put in a period and a space. also, not that long ago I was looking up something on my laptop and I copied the text and then picked up my phone to paste the item into a text message. really, I did this.
I shall work on making an app that does this. that lets you copy on laptop and paste into iphone. I shall make millions.
now, for some photographs.
- a conversation with the baby
- The Dog Who Saved Christmas